The Answer
by Crystallia Silver
Summary: He could hear the question echoing in his head. Naoji/Ludwig. Oneshot.


Author's note: Meine Liebe is a lovely anime which I discovered recently, with entrancing character development and plot, as well as good direction in most scenes.

22/1/2011: This story has been largely re-edited because I found that the initial result had many weak points and problems in both plot and technique. I apologise to those who read its previous form. I hope you enjoy this version more.

The Answer

_"Are you in love?"_

He could hear the question echoing in his head. He remembered the innocent expression on Camus' face and the chaste interest in his voice clearly, as though the young man was asking something simple. Naoji leaned his elbows on the table and crossed his fingers, bringing his face close, with his lips touching the thumb lightly. It wasn't easy to say it. The answer was lying there, hidden and true, but the very effort to accept it thoroughly pained him, worried him.

There were strong emotions that wouldn't become silent and any effort to repress them, only led to a greater inner confusion. Camus should have sensed that too, apart from the unsaid feelings...

Naoji's fathomless affection and untainted passion were secretly reflected in multiple forms of fantasy... him, embracing Ludwig with both arms, kissing his lips carefully and tasting the warmth of his mouth as the two of them traced each other's body with touches, breathing and words...

Every day with the wise Strahl candidate included moments that fulfilled him emotionally. A conversation after the end of classes while drinking tea, talking about training and school events, or watching the sun falling below the horizon, outside the window of Ludwig's room in quietness... all these were meaningful to them and Naoji had also found an intense beauty even in Ludwig's silence. They had developed it into a form of communication based on deep understanding and unconditional respect.

Naoji always thought that his closest friend in the Academy was a unique individual, gentle and powerful both in mind and body, an enthralling rose with sharp thorns, a bright sun during winter.

Ludwig was light and dark together. A rare existence.

He remembered how they introduced themselves. How the imposing man spoke to him...

As far as he could remember, the affection that surrounded his heart emerged at a later time, although he had cultivated the impression of carrying the awareness of Ludwig's existence long before his first step on the island of Kuchen.

Perhaps there were also moments when the fellow Strahl might have shown that he desired the same kind of bond, but Naoji wouldn't allow himself to believe it unless he had strong proof for it. No, he wouldn't force his own feelings on his companion in any way, never.

Naoji rose from his sit and wiped a tear that managed to escape from his eye. He wandered among the flower-beds of the greenhouse, letting his gaze linger on the beautifully-bloomed chrysanthemums. Then he stopped near the window, watching his breathing forming a small, blurry circle on the clear glass.

He was still thinking about Camus' question... there was a comforting certainty in his voice, an underlying message asking him not to worry. It heartened Naoji for a while, giving him the chance to see through Camus' eyes for a minute, but it was impossible to ignore his own reservations.

He felt that his fantasies were too far from Ludwig, despite the fact that the two students were often physically near to each other. Ludwig had devoted his spirit and mind -his whole being- to a grand purpose and wouldn't allow anything or anyone to distract his focus from his personal goals and ambition.

" He is too far...", Naoji muttered quietly to himself and closed his eyes, sighing lightly. Camus, who had been there with him during this hour, blinked and suddenly turned his gaze towards the exit door...

After a few seconds, the sound of the door opening was heard in the silent place.

Naoji immediately recognized the visitor merely by the footsteps.

The fresh fragrance of the new presence flooded the place. Ludwig looked at his classmates, waiting for them to say something first.

Naoji greeted him with a bow while Camus approached him smiling, " Lui, we have been waiting for you. How come you didn't join us sooner?"

" I had a class to go to."

" Then it's okay."

Ludwig looked at Naoji, " Have you had lunch yet?"

" No, we agreed to go together."

The usual, strict expression on Ludwig's face loosened slightly and a positive nod followed.

As they moved towards the exit, Ludwig stopped for a moment and concentrated his attention on his trustworthy companion. Naoji came to a halt and then he cast a quick, questioning glance towards the mysterious eyes that inspected him in silence. Before the quiet Strahl could decide what to say or do, he felt the tips of gloved fingers touching his face and neck softly. The contact did not make Naoji feel uncomfortable, there was enough closeness between them and thus this gesture couldn't be seen as inappropriate or suspicious. In the meantime, Camus had distanced himself a little, standing outside the greenhouse.

" Your eyes are clear and calm, but in their depth, I can discern a spark, a sign of conflict as if you are facing an opposing force that lies within yourself."

" Battle is an inseparable part of my existence." Naoji uttered fearlessly.

The words sounded like a riddle to the usually mysterious student.

" I am not so far from you as you may imagine and certainly not out of reach... neither you are, from me." Ludwig eventually said, staring into his eyes.

Naoji was clearly surprised for a moment. But he regained his composure quickly. " That pleases me to hear. It really does. Although I still haven't measured how near to you I can actually stand."

" You will find out soon." Ludwig asserted with the smallest hint of an honest smile. " It's strange though. I thought you already knew." He added and then he proceeded outside, walking past Camus who waited for Naoji and willing to hear what he was about to say.

The overseas student told him, " The answer is yes. I was aware of it all along. I just couldn't admit it."

When they were about to resume walking, they saw Ludwig looking back at them with his habitual, glaring expression and had his arms crossed on his chest. " Hurry up now."

The Japanese Strahl noticed a quick flash of warmth flitting across Ludwig's face before he turned ahead.

_" Lui... everything will be alright. I will make sure of it."_

Without fail.


End file.
